still going
I can't believe how much has happend in such a short span of time. My mom is here!!! It's so unbelievable. It's insane how much I took my mom for granted growing up. There's no one like her and no one can ever compare to her. I love her so much, i don't know what i would do with out her. I know i realized that before, but it really hit me yesterday. I spent the entire day with her at the hospital because she's been really sick. She had a really bad cough, and to see my mom in a hospital bed with iv's and all those horrible things... i just don't know what i would do without her. my mom is my heart. I am so thankful to God for the privilage of being her daughter. I know she's gonna get better, she already looks better, and she'll just continue to get stronger. She should be out come tomorrow.I'm still on a job hunt. Haven't nabbed anything yet, but i will soon. I got a little discouraged because i'm not used to not being called back. I'm used to getting the job immediately, but it's a tough world out there. I know i'll get a job soon. Just taking longer than expected. People have asked why i haven't got a job doing customer service, but i just can't anymore. AFter blockbuster and that shit that happend there, i can't. I deserve better. It's too grooling working with crabby people, and all that bull donkey... Good job here i come.
Hanako is coming soon. So soon it's like 5 days today till she's back to cali cal. I miss her so much. I mean come on, not many people get to find a soulmate... and Hanako is definately one of my soulmates, it's amazing how we're always going through something similar. Love her lots.
Spring break is almost over. It's so sad. I haven't done much, just been on interviews and been with my mom. Haven't had that great of sleep either. I need to catch up. I need to do a lot of things. time is going by quick.
Hmm then there's joe... er i mean Jr. I thin it's funny how they call him junior, i don't know any juniors. Things are still going. It's interesting getting to know someone you have no tie to, i mean that by i don't know anyone who knows him so i can't get that scoop about him. I can't find out about his past in any shape way or form only by getting to know him. It's different, but scary. Hence my posts last week... i dont know, i guess it was good tho just because it made me realize that i'm not jumping into anything.
someone asked me if a person in my past came back to me while the whole joe thing went on, what i would do. The only thing i could do would be to follow my heart. If my heart wasn't with joe and i stayed with him (not that we're a couple or anything), i would be not only lying to myself, but lying to him... But if joe happend to manage to break through the walls, i would stay with him. But than all these other thoughts popped into my mind because obviously the person in my past is in my past for a reason, if he wanted to be with me now than he would have came after me... why does he deserve a second chance... or why does jared deserve a 4th chance? If my friendship is all i could give, i would hope that they would take it.
Err... like i said joe and i are just chilling. I still don't know much about him, i don't knkow what he wants to do with his life, and i also don't know much about his past, all i do know is that i don't mind wasting time with him for the time being.
"Build You Up" - Nelly Furtado
Baby don't believe it
Oh, it's in your eyes
I can see the weakness
You don't have to hide
I can take you under
Under my wing
cause your voice gives me a song
That i love to sing
Baby, they build you up
Only to tear you down
Don't give up
Baby don't believe it, baby don't believe it
Baby they build you up
Only to tear you down
Baby don't believe it, baby don't believe it
Oh, it's good for nothing
You were just a child
Ready to explore
And everything you saw
Looked like an open door
A place you can remember
You'd love to go back
But you can't even comprehend
That it's all in the past
Baby they build you up
Only to tear you down
Baby don't believe it, baby don't believe it
Oh, it's good for nothing
Baby they build you up
Only to tear you down
Baby don't believe it, baby don't believe it
Oh, it's good for nothing
Put your heart in my hands and i won't hurt you
Put your heart in my hands
I promise not to
I'll lift you up, you'll fly away, I'll lift you up, lift you up
I'll never build you up, only to tear you down
Baby just believe it, baby just believe it, it's good for something
I'll never build you up, only to tear you down, oh it's good for nothing
And i love you the way you are
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